talk to get closer
talk to establish status
when women say "I'm sorry" they often mean "I'm sorry that happened to you."
when men say "I'm sorry", it puts them in a one-down position (so they say it less often)
Start OUT - and work way IN to a decision
Stat IN (this is what I want) - and work out if need be
rapport talk (get closer) = troubles talk (just to talk)
report talk (announce status) = "fix" a problem (establish status)
teasing (ritual opposition) (boys)
sharing (girls) (when girls fight they really are fighting, not just playing)
PREMISE 1: IN A COUPLE, ONE IS THE BOSS
PREMISE 2: IN A COUPLE, BOTH ARE EQUAL
SEE IF YOU CAN TAKE ONE OF THE "8" BELOW AND WEAVE IT INTO TANNEN'S THEME OF CONVERSATIONAL STYLE
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